A chance for destiny October 16, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Réflexions diverses.Tags: boyfriend, chance, destiny, feelings, friend, gem, girl, Love, man, marriage, smart
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Read more about Joe and how she just doesn’t allow herself to find her knight in shining armour at http://www.luckyandvin.com/relationships/to-give-destiny-a-chance/
OMG!!!! June 22, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Relationships.Tags: 20 days, excited, families, feelings, Love, man, marriage, married, tensed
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Just 20 days more!!! I am going to be married to the love of my life in just 20 days! That knowledge seen in writing (as I saw when I visited ewedding.com) scared me so much!!!
I mean..a marriage is something not just between two people right.. It is a joining of two families..adjustments, commitments, difference of views and opinions.. OMG!! I am SO freaked out right now!!! I feel this tumultous feelings inside me.. I wanna marry him and share my life with him.. But at the same time, I am scared about how to interact with the rest of his family when we all become one big family in 20 days time..
Ooh baby! I just wish these pre-marriage jitters would go away!!! Thought I wasnt going to have them.. Now, I see I was wrong.. Just hope I get through this soon!!!
I am excited.. (Very much..) but I am a lil tensed too…
Promises May 3, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Poetry.Tags: broken, confused, feelings, life, Poem, Poetry, promises, sorrow, truth
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Promises.
They are made to be broken.
I took for granted
a promise, to be
a bond forever.
But lately realized
it’s not.
I got confused.
I became agitated.
I was surprised
and I was shaken.
I cried
and I fussed.
But nothing could change
the truth.
that a promise,
no longer meant promise.
– Lucky (LHNV)
Talking about him.. May 3, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Relationships.Tags: "The One", attraction, feelings, first love, first time, heart, innocence, lasting love, life, man, marriage, package, patience, Relationship, romance, true, unconditional, wife
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There are times I wish I were with him. In fact, I yearn for that almost all the time.
I did not know when I first met him that he would be the one for me.. that someday I would be his.. that he would be the one I would spend the rest of my life with.. that I would find so much of this thing that we keep on hearing about so often and that so many follow sometimes vainly- true love – from him…
The first moment my eyes fell on him, I felt some sort of attraction.. a pull you could maybe say. My friends did not think much of my choice.. but he was somehow seemed very captivating to me with his smart dressing, his long strided determined walk, his cautious eyes, his innocent smile and his completely charming laughter 🙂 Thinking about the first time we talked to each other, a smile already forms on my face.. Both of us were at a loss for words but me being the chatterbox that I am, somehow managed to keep up the conversation while tension was eating me from inside and my heart was beating so loud that I thought he might hear it!!! 😉
He has a weird sense of humour..but 😀 makes me laugh almost all the time 🙂 He loves holding my hand over the gear while driving.. He enjoys teasing me and I’m pretty sure he finds it a great hobby to see all the various expressions that so easily comes over my face when he says something or the other..
When we are together and alone he makes me want him so bad and then teases me by pulling away and giving me that o so adorable smile and a naughty laughter! How can I even get angry at him when face to face..Absolutely no chance!
Everything was moving so smoothly. .so beautifully.. life was brilliant..bright..full of hope..full of shine.. Yea.. The problem is now. When everything became so alright with everyone.. when everyone now knows that we are soon going to be man and wife.. It now has become so trapped.. somehow secluded.. and I feel so much pressure from all sides.. “You must do this this way.”Don’t do that.”, “You have to take care of him.”, ” Do you know cooking?”, “No. You have to see to it that he is comfortable.”, “You have to find a job near his place.”, “Does he approve?”, “Don’t you think you should ask him about it?”, “How can you take your own decision? Check with him too.”
Why? Why? Why?!!! We have been together for like forever!!!! 4 years is quite a long time and in these years, we had gotten to know each other quite a bit.. and I thought.. actually, I felt that we were married..in a way. The only thing lacking from our “marriage” was the fact that it was not yet legal. But, seeing how things turn after making a relationship public and getting engaged, I sometimes feel that maybe it wasn’t such a wise idea. I could have just stayed a spinster and kept loving him…
But, that is just one side of the coin…
All the freedom we get with each other and all the time we get to spend with each other make up for everything else.. Even now, deep inside my heart, nothing has changed from the first moment I met him.. All those feelings.. All those thoughts.. All the crazy beating of my heart.. Everything is the same! 🙂
Still, there is that aspect of subtlety missing these days. No more of those adventures of getting away without anybody else’ knowledge.. No more long night calls and morning wake up calls.. No more extra appreciation and passionate desire to spend time alone.. I miss all that..
Still… …. …. to be with the man you love and who loves you back.. to be an equal partner and spend your life with him.. to intertwine both your roads of life to make it one long happy journey is enough to keep any girl happy..
…
He is the one who made me even think of marriage and kids.. in short, the entire package! 😉
..So, yea.. i cant wait to begin my life with him..as man and wife 🙂
Undeserved April 30, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Poetry.Tags: cry, deserve, feelings, life, lost, Love, moment, myself, new, people, Poem, Poetry, shine, stillness, tears, undeserved, way, wonder, wrong
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The leaves stand still
Not a single twig
out of line..
I feel no wind dancing around my face,
twirling my hair..
The clouds are looming
dark and thick
with its unspent content..
Like the tears I feel
filling behind my eyes..
Sitting lost in thoughts
wondering where I went wrong
I feel an ache in my heart
as the tears threaten
to flow any moment…
Let it go, I tell myself..
So be it, I tell myself..
But deep inside
I know I dont deserve this.
I dont deserve
to sit in a corner and cry
I dont deserve
to be shunned and looked down upon
by the ones who matter most..
I just dont deserve to be treated this way!!!
I deserve
to be cherished,
to be loved,
to be hugged and be valued..
But here I am,
in a corner..
Misunderstood!
Disliked!!
Ill-treated!!!
The threatening tears finally find a way out..
and I cry n’ cry..
For moments lost,
for love lost,
for people gone,
for those dreams of being understood gone..
I cry for becoming this what I am now
I cry for changing into something I am not..
The rains wash down my tears
and I feel cleansed
As I listen to the chirp of the birds,
and watch the flowers smiling at me
as the sun shines on me,
revealing new ways, new dreams.. and a new bloom!!!
-Lucky (LHNV)
Him… :) April 29, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Relationships.Tags: expressions, feelings, he, him, lost, Love, Relationship, truth, wonderful
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He looks at me.. I can feel my legs become jelly..
He smiles at me… My cheeks turn red…
He holds me.. My knees start trembling..
He pulls me closer to him.. I can feel the tingling all through my body..
He begins speaking to me.. I get lost in those deep black brown eyes of his..
He laughs out loud at something funny and a 100 watt smile forms across my face.. 🙂
He sits beside me, his arms around my shoulders… and I feel warm inside..
We hold hands and I feel complete..
I love hm so much.. Even through the frequent arguments and disagreements that are so silly that we laugh about it while making up, even when I feel down and his hectic schedule makes me feel as though I no longer have an important place in his heart, I love him.. 🙂 No particular reason that I can pinpoint.. but yet.. he’ there and I love him…
All he has to do is take my hands in his, call my name softly and look at me.. and say that he loves me.. Im lost.. I am so totally lost at that moment.. All my barriers.. all my anger.. all my fears, sorrows, worries… everything melts away into vaccuum!!! The only truth I feel at that moment and what I know is true is the vast and deep endless ocean of love that he has just for me 🙂 and I know that is enough for ever…
Why? April 20, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Réflexions diverses.Tags: changes, feelings, Feminism, girl power, men, multitasking, strength, Thoughts, why, Woman
3 comments
Its been awhile since Ive posted anything here.. Its just that there’s been so much happening..what with the wedding coming up and all..
…
So, as I was sitting here, tag surfing and playing on all the various networking sites, the thought suddenly struck me.. Why is it that men do not undergo the same problems that a woman goes through in her life? Why does the woman have to suffer the pain of both menstruation as well as childbirth? Why not a man? Why were we created this way?
Doesnt a man need to know how it feels with all the hormonal changes, physical changes and mood swings and the aches and pains and the tumultous feelings rushing through us…???
Why can men not realize the strength of a woman which lets her undergo all these things in life and emerge victorious.. overcoming her fears, her sorrows, her pains and working her way through life.. slogging in the office to better those who think that women are just not as capable as men. Working hard at home also, to care for and love her husband, kids and family…to turn a house into a home and make it shining with love beams..
…
Ive always hoped that some day men might understand exactly how strong a woman is and what makes her tick and what makes her snooze.. ie; what turns her on and what turns her off.. and yet understand also that women however strong they maybe, require that much the more amount of love and affection from a man to make her mentally strong and give her inner strength its brute power!!!
Sinking.. April 9, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Poetry.Tags: cold, feelings, heartbreak, hope, impressions, insane, Love, Poem, Poetry, sadness, sink, sorrow, useless
4 comments
Sinking into loneliness,
into the depths of sorrow,
impressions of having “The One”,
to care for me,
keep me happy,
I realize was false..
None to look upto..
Nobody to offer me comfort..
I weep into the one faithful friend I have- my pillow.
My only solace.
Music bang my ears.
Heart thudding,
Palms and feet cold as ice,
Through the heartbreak I wait.
Hoping even then
for a miracle..
for him to care enough…
Am I just anybody?
Am I not good enough for him?
He pushes my limits..
He drives me insane..
He strains my seams…
He just doesnt understand!!
what it means,
that one small yet strong word – love!!!
– Lucky
Alone Forever… April 6, 2008
Posted by Giselle in Relationships.Tags: experience, family, feelings, lonely, lost, miserable, sad, sorrow, suicidal, suicide, tears, unwanted, upset
3 comments
Today I feel cheated. I feel betrayed.
Something that I had thought would not happen, happened. Someone I thought would be with me through thick and thin, whether we be having a fight/argument or not, left me stranded..left me just hanging there with my tumult of emotions, tears running down my cheek..making me feel unloved, unwanted.
Am I such a bad person that Im not required in anybody’ life..? Am I so much an extra addition in everyone’ life…? The sorrow just doesnt dim. The tears just dont stop.. cz’ the two people who did these things are so damn very important to me… 😥
……
Does it not hurt you when you are not treated the way you treat others..? Does it not make you feel miserable when you are treated like shit and just turned to when someone requires something…? Do you not feel unwanted when the people most close to you, dont feel the same way about you..?
It does hurt me. I do feel miserable. And I do feel very unwanted. 😦
It makes me realize that in the end, it is only your parents and your siblings you can depend upon.. cz’ they are the only ones who would keep aside a fight for you. They are the only ones who would tell you when there’ something wrong. They are the only ones who will leave everything to rush to your side when you need them. They are the only ones who will take your side forever and never humiliate you i nfront of others. They are the only ones who will love you unconditionally, ferociously, passionately! …
I once thought that it is a husband and wife who would and should stick together no matter what. But now, I have learnt otherwise. From personal experience.